how to deal with THAT person... 🌚🤦🏻♀️
we all have the misfortune from time to time of meeting with an acquaintance whose moral compass is far drawn off of treasure island, whose bedside manner (shall we say) is flailing, and whose general existence is... well, an annoyance.
but you are a bigger and better person than to give into that rise of fire inside of you that just wants to pummel them. don't do that, habibi.
instead, take heed of some solumn bucci baby advice, channel your inner zen and do the following...
THE EX WHO WONT LEAVE U DE F⭐️CK ALONE
ahhh the ex who just wont quit the game
they stalk you on social media, they harass your friends, they think every man (or woman) you merely say hello to is a threat... yeah, its probably the worst social issue to have.
if there is an ex who will not stop pestering you, block them. modern technology has advanced in many non beneficial ways... but the beauty of tech is that you can block: emails, phones, facebook accounts, IG accounts - everything. if you are "too nice" a person and don't want to hurt their feelings by fully blocking them, you also havr the option to "restrict" accounts, or mute them, meaning they can still see you from a distance... for lack of better words, but not be able to message you or see all your social content.
if failing that, you are in full rights to report them for stalking and harassment, even if its cyber based. your sanity, security and sense of freedom is more important than the itch in their pants to get you back - babycakes.
THE "FRIEND" WHO IS NEVER PRESENT
this is a hard one, because its like a relationship nearing a breakup... but you still love em.
communication is key here. you need to somehow manage to get them on the phone, or better: in a face to face meetup and just express how you feel. ive had to do this a lot with friends of mine when I feel we've become out of touch. making a list beforehand can be helpful so you stay on track and dont actually offend him/her. such as...
🌟 you never answer your phone: what is the best way for YOU to stay in touch? is there a better time of day or specific day to catch up?
🌟 do you still want to be friends: is it me? can i maybe change in some way, or have i done something thats upset you which i may not be aware of?
🌟 im worried about you: is your mental health okay, how is work, school, family? i want to be here for you and improve us!
🌟 calling them out on their bs: dont be totally prissy and make it about them. if they are in the wrong, say it loudly, clearly and in a non passive aggressive fashion
THE SELF ABSORBED ONE
this one is actually THE hardest because you simply cannot change a selfish person- its just the way they are. but what you CAN do is adjust your own personal processing towards the issues at hand in some very simple ways...
Give yourself the attention you deserve.
Selfish people are emotional pirates. They crave for your attention, but don’t give you any. To avoid being wrung dry of emotions, give yourself the attention you’ve been giving the emotional pirate. For example, if there is any discomfort in your physical appearance, head to the barber or boutique and improve it. This is called meeting your own needs, and it’s a great way to boost your ego and pirate-proof your life.
THE UNEDUCATED BEING
do i sound mean? i dont care. everyone education is to some degree within their own hands. and if someone is making YOU feel stupid when they're the one in the dark about a social, politicial or any other form of issue?... laugh it off, and walk away. or change topics. whilst stupidity can push your buttons and make you feel like pulling out their hair—don’t do it. Don’t play into their game or engage in behavior that is beneath you. Just be true to yourself. alleviate any feeling of being disgruntled or strained by focusing on the person you are and resolving to continue being that considerate and intellectual person that you know you are.
ooof, i questioned whether to include this one or not... but with everything 2020 has thrown at us, i couldnt not really.
the three main things to try to do are to...
⭐️ react calmly
⭐️ be kind
⭐️ react towards the issue, not the person
i wouldnt recommend wasting your time trying to educate them or shift their stance. each to their own, but do calmly vocalise why you FEEL or BELIEVE they are incorrect and state your reasons in a way that doesnt open the threshold to a full blown argument. if you know and generally do like the person, switch topics if you feel able to. if not, end the comversation swiftly and politely, and get the f💥ck outta there!
whilst we like to believe most outgrow the class clown demeanour, for some, its their only crutch in life. to get into trouble, blame the world and worst of all: try to drag you down with them.
please, for the actual love of a donut, do NOT engage with these people. you dont need that energy in your life. you dont need a criminal record. you dont need cheap laughs and petty memories that were in hindsight f💥cking stupid to be a part of. go find some likeminded people, never allow your morals to be swayed and... i give you permission to g h o s t them. (ie cut off communication LIKE DAT)
you got dis, boo
stay true to youuu